It's my birthday and I'll go gray if I want to!

This Sunday, December 12, will mark the 27th anniversary of my parents being brave enough to give me breath on this delicate planet. For all the "I put you in this world, I can take you out" (joke) threats I heard over the years, I still feel indebted to their bravery and willingness to risk it all.  I cannot imagine yet what concern and trepidation they must have felt taking on a third child.

I have always loved birthdays and often made a HUGE deal out of mine.  I used to feel as though I was competing with baby Jesus, then college finals, and now semester/work break at my school for a little recognition in mid-December.  A few years ago, I really began to realize that I was not the one who deserved praise, because I hadn't done anything extraordinary--my parents had.  Of course, I haven't given up selfishness in its entirety.  My friends think that as the numbers start approaching 3_, birthdays become less important, or fun, or worse, that in some way they are fearsome or shameful.  Fact is, I know that one day I will be a mom like many of my family members, and instead of celebrating me along with all other moms out there in May, I still want a day to call my own.  I want to be a priority to my family and I want something, no matter how small to signify a stopping point in our otherwise incredibly busy lives for my closest loved ones to say: JaNelle, we love you and you are special.  Still selfish, I know.


I am pushing 30 now and feel as though I am almost ready for it.  I want to keep growing as an individual and finding new ways to use my God-given talents to make my world a better place.  In the same regard, I would like to find new ways to celebrate my journey.  I do not want my facebook wall laden with trite birthday wishes, although I know it will be.  I want to spend time with the people closest to me and let them know that they are my inspiration to grow and that their positive influence on my life is vital.  I want my birthday to be about giving back.  For this year, that party would be small: just me and my man.  Patrick and I are on the cusp of some major life changes--probably before my birthday 12/12/12, we will make our pilgrimage back to the state of Texas and hopefully begin a family of our own. 

This weekend we are going to San Diego, just us.  We are exploring a city that neither of us knows and doing whatever we want, whenever we want, based on a skeleton route that I put together on a gMap.  When he asked me what I wanted to do for my birthday thoughts of camping came up form both ends.  I told him that it didn't matter *where* I was just that we were together.  The only thing that would be more like having my own family getaway would be if Lex was with us, but sending her to Rolando Camp will be easier than trying to sneak her into every place we go.  I also told him that what I wanted most of all was for both of us to be out of cell phone and internet signal for most of the trip.  I know I can be an attention hog, and maybe this is too much to ask of anyone in 2010 because we are all too connected and leashed to our personal communication devices, but this is truly my birthday wish.

If you get to this post before we leave, please leave all the comments and messages here and on facebook that you like, but understand if I do not process them all until Monday.  I want to breathe for my birthday.  I want to love and be loved.  I want to understand and be understood.  I want to walk into this 27th year with a clear mind and an open heart.  I will accept the increasing number of gray hairs on my scalp and I will accept my eventual departure from this place--the one on the West Coast and the Ultimate one.

My final thoughts that I would like to share, of (fairly) sound 26 year-old mind and body, are to honor those around me as well as those who have gone so far away...


Thank you Patrick and Lexi for warming my heart and home and all-in-all, putting up with me. 
Thank you Westridge for always provide me a place to grow and explore along with the rest of you. 
Thank you friends near and far for always hearing me out, even when you may have disagreed.
Thank you Mom, for always believing, especially in 1983. 
Thank you Garry for taking care of Mom and keeping the laughs up at Wilderness. 
Thank you Weatherfords for caring for each other when I cannot be present.
Thank you Oggs for always have a smile on your face and love in your hearts.
Thank you Texas for always being there--reminding me of my heritage and my beginnings. 
Thank you David and all the other soldiers for keeping us safe and proud.
Thank you Granddad for making heaven an even better place.
Thank you Uncle Don and Uncle John for welcoming him.

Thanks to everyone who has helped me become the strong and happy person that I am!